It was a Saturday evening and Joseph and his wife, Ann, had just gotten into their third argument of the day and both were now giving each other the "silent treatment," vowing not to be the first one to speak.
However, at bedtime, Joseph realized that he would need his wife, who always awoke at 4:30am to wake him at 5:00am to get ready for an early morning golf session with his buddies. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and thus lose the "battle"), Joseph wrote on a piece of paper,
"Ann, please wake me at 5:00am."
The next morning, Joseph woke up at 9am, having missed his tee time with his friends. Furious, Joseph was about to go and see why his wife hadn't awakened him when he noticed a piece of paperon his nightstand. The note read,
"Joseph, it's 5:00am. Wake up."
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Mr Bean-Elementary Dating
Rowan Atkinson has been packing theatres all over the world for ten years with his one-man comedy show. This performance was filmed live at the Huntington Theatre..
Saturday, December 8, 2007
10 Ways to Break Up Graciously
Whether it's you or your partner who decides to end your relationship, it's not easy to break up. Nobody enjoys breaking up, but sometimes it has to be done. Here are 10 tips on how to break up graciously:
1. Don't drag it out.
When it is over, it's over. You're not doing your partner or yourself any favors by delaying the inevitable. Sooner is better than later.
2. Be honest.
The oldest line is "it’s me not you." Although this might be easier, the only way you can truly help your partner is by being completely honest.
3. Don't overlap.
The worst thing you can do is start seeing someone else before you tell your partner that it is over. It not only makes you look bad, but will also plant seeds of doubt in your new partner.
4. Can we be friends?
Don't expect to be friends after a break up. Even if you were friends before you became intimate, your friendship likely can never be the same again.
5. Listen.
Don’t expect to end the relationship with your partner wanting to leave it at that, especially if it has come out the blue. Your partner will want to ask questions and may even try and talk you into changing your mind. Allow your partner to have his/her say. This will give you the chance to explain in full why you want to end the relationship. Think about how you would feel if you where the one being dumped. You would want to ask questions.
6. Don't do it in a public place.
Even if you no longer like your partner, the worse thing you can do is dump him/her in a public place. It is the ultimate humiliation.
7. Write down how you feel.
Ending it face to face can be very difficult. Write a letter explaining why you want to break up. But deliver it in person, and be there to talk with your partner afterwards.
8. Don't feel guilty.
More often than not when we try to end a relationship we are made to feel guilty by the other, which makes us stay and hate the person more. If you want out, then no matter how much your partner begs ("I’ll change," "I’ve done so much for you"), stick to your decision before things get worse.
9. Don't pick a fight.
The only reason we pick a fight is to ease the guilt that we bring upon our partner when he/she thinks it is his/her fault. Get straight to the point and don’t make your partner suffer more than necessary.
10. Leave as you would like to be left.
Being dumped is a horrible thing. Try to think about how you would want to be dumped if the tables were turned. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
1. Don't drag it out.
When it is over, it's over. You're not doing your partner or yourself any favors by delaying the inevitable. Sooner is better than later.
2. Be honest.
The oldest line is "it’s me not you." Although this might be easier, the only way you can truly help your partner is by being completely honest.
3. Don't overlap.
The worst thing you can do is start seeing someone else before you tell your partner that it is over. It not only makes you look bad, but will also plant seeds of doubt in your new partner.
4. Can we be friends?
Don't expect to be friends after a break up. Even if you were friends before you became intimate, your friendship likely can never be the same again.
5. Listen.
Don’t expect to end the relationship with your partner wanting to leave it at that, especially if it has come out the blue. Your partner will want to ask questions and may even try and talk you into changing your mind. Allow your partner to have his/her say. This will give you the chance to explain in full why you want to end the relationship. Think about how you would feel if you where the one being dumped. You would want to ask questions.
6. Don't do it in a public place.
Even if you no longer like your partner, the worse thing you can do is dump him/her in a public place. It is the ultimate humiliation.
7. Write down how you feel.
Ending it face to face can be very difficult. Write a letter explaining why you want to break up. But deliver it in person, and be there to talk with your partner afterwards.
8. Don't feel guilty.
More often than not when we try to end a relationship we are made to feel guilty by the other, which makes us stay and hate the person more. If you want out, then no matter how much your partner begs ("I’ll change," "I’ve done so much for you"), stick to your decision before things get worse.
9. Don't pick a fight.
The only reason we pick a fight is to ease the guilt that we bring upon our partner when he/she thinks it is his/her fault. Get straight to the point and don’t make your partner suffer more than necessary.
10. Leave as you would like to be left.
Being dumped is a horrible thing. Try to think about how you would want to be dumped if the tables were turned. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
Friday, November 30, 2007
Some Men are Like
courtesy : OnlineDatingMagazine.com
Puppies.
They're cute at first, but you soon tire of picking up their crap.
Remote controls.
Chances are you'll find them lying by the TV.
Parking spaces at a popular mall.
The good ones are all taken.
Computers.
In order to get their attention, you must first turn them on.
Fine wine.
They take a long time to mature.
Oatmeal.
If they sit too long, they become lumpy.
Mascara.
They run at the first sign of tears.
Silverware.
They on appear only when there is food on the table.
Cats.
Only moving objects get their attention.
Dogs.
They take up too much space on the bed..
Fish.
They're easy to catch with food.
Text Messages.
The shorter the message, the easier it is for them to understand
Bees.
They like to pollenate more than one flower.
Puppies.
They're cute at first, but you soon tire of picking up their crap.
Remote controls.
Chances are you'll find them lying by the TV.
Parking spaces at a popular mall.
The good ones are all taken.
Computers.
In order to get their attention, you must first turn them on.
Fine wine.
They take a long time to mature.
Oatmeal.
If they sit too long, they become lumpy.
Mascara.
They run at the first sign of tears.
Silverware.
They on appear only when there is food on the table.
Cats.
Only moving objects get their attention.
Dogs.
They take up too much space on the bed..
Fish.
They're easy to catch with food.
Text Messages.
The shorter the message, the easier it is for them to understand
Bees.
They like to pollenate more than one flower.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
What Not to Do on a Date
by Joe Tracy - Publisher of Online Dating Magazine
There is a saying that "you never get a second chance to make a good first impression" and that's especially true on a first date.
When you know how to properly act on a date, you secure a better chance at getting a second date. Learning proper etiquette, however, first requires knowing what dating turnoffs to avoid.
Here are 10 dating turnoffs that you should avoid like the plague:
1) Don't Get Drunk
Make sure you don’t have one too many drinks while you’re out on a date. It can be quite easy to lose track how many you’ve had, especially if you’re having a great time. If you are not sure that you can control yourself, opt for a non-alcoholic beverage instead. Having no drinks is always the safest route to take on a first date.
2) Don't be a Womanizer.or a Manizer
On your date there is nothing more annoying and disrespectful than a roaming eye targeting members of the opposite sex. Keep your eyes on your date.
3) Don't Discuss Controversial Topics
Talking about politics, religion or hot debatable topics is a sure way to get off on the wrong footing with your date. It's also important not to get emotional. Now isn’t the time to share too much. Don’t talk about your “exes”, and don’t do a rundown of everything that’s wrong with your life (major turnoff). Keep things light and positive.
4) Don't Bring a Friend on Your Date
Bringing a friend on your date is an instant way to make your date feel like a third wheel. Unless you are going on a group date, bringing someone else along is disrespectful and lets the other person know you are not truly interested in getting to know him/her. It's a great way to ruin what could have been a dynamic date with interesting conversation.
5) Don't Leave Your Cell Phone On
A ringing cell phone is highly annoying a date. Even more annoying is when the date answers the call! Keep your cell phone with you, but turn it off. Never have a friend call you as a way of getting out of a date ("an emergency came up - I have to go"). Instead, just be honest. If a date isn't going well, do the right thing and end it early without lies. You will be more respected for it.
6) Don't Dominate the Conversation
Dominating a conversation is a big dating turnoff - especially for men. You want to try to make sure that the conversation is balanced. You should be asking as many questions as you are answering. You should be asking follow-up questions to things your date says. Most of all, you should be focused on the conversation and not what you are going to say next.
7) Don't Lie
When a person lies (whether in their online dating profile, on a date, or while in a relationship) they lose instant credibility. Try practicing being 100% honest with everything in your life. You'll see major improvements in your relationships, dating life, and self esteem. Lying destroys credibility and potential relationships. Learn to always be truthful in a sincere way.
8) Don't be Late
Being late to a date gets your date off on the wrong foot. If you know you are going to be late and can't help it, then call the person in advance. Tell them you are running late, when you'll be there, and that you are looking forward to seeing them.
9) Don't Make Decisions for Your Date
Some men think it's cool to order for their date, when in reality it is inconsiderate. Some women like it, but most don't. Like you, your date can think for himself/herself and when you take that away from them, the date may see you as being compulsive or controlling. And that's a turnoff.
10) Don't Eat Like You're Starving to Death
On a date, you should eat normal and with proper table manners. If your date sees someone who looks like they haven't eaten in weeks, it may make them wonder about your lifestyle (and income).
Dating is a lot of fun. You meet interesting people and can find that potential soul mate for life. By avoiding dating turnoffs, you improve your chances of getting a second date along with building dating habits that are healthy for you and your date.
There is a saying that "you never get a second chance to make a good first impression" and that's especially true on a first date.
When you know how to properly act on a date, you secure a better chance at getting a second date. Learning proper etiquette, however, first requires knowing what dating turnoffs to avoid.
Here are 10 dating turnoffs that you should avoid like the plague:
1) Don't Get Drunk
Make sure you don’t have one too many drinks while you’re out on a date. It can be quite easy to lose track how many you’ve had, especially if you’re having a great time. If you are not sure that you can control yourself, opt for a non-alcoholic beverage instead. Having no drinks is always the safest route to take on a first date.
2) Don't be a Womanizer.or a Manizer
On your date there is nothing more annoying and disrespectful than a roaming eye targeting members of the opposite sex. Keep your eyes on your date.
3) Don't Discuss Controversial Topics
Talking about politics, religion or hot debatable topics is a sure way to get off on the wrong footing with your date. It's also important not to get emotional. Now isn’t the time to share too much. Don’t talk about your “exes”, and don’t do a rundown of everything that’s wrong with your life (major turnoff). Keep things light and positive.
4) Don't Bring a Friend on Your Date
Bringing a friend on your date is an instant way to make your date feel like a third wheel. Unless you are going on a group date, bringing someone else along is disrespectful and lets the other person know you are not truly interested in getting to know him/her. It's a great way to ruin what could have been a dynamic date with interesting conversation.
5) Don't Leave Your Cell Phone On
A ringing cell phone is highly annoying a date. Even more annoying is when the date answers the call! Keep your cell phone with you, but turn it off. Never have a friend call you as a way of getting out of a date ("an emergency came up - I have to go"). Instead, just be honest. If a date isn't going well, do the right thing and end it early without lies. You will be more respected for it.
6) Don't Dominate the Conversation
Dominating a conversation is a big dating turnoff - especially for men. You want to try to make sure that the conversation is balanced. You should be asking as many questions as you are answering. You should be asking follow-up questions to things your date says. Most of all, you should be focused on the conversation and not what you are going to say next.
7) Don't Lie
When a person lies (whether in their online dating profile, on a date, or while in a relationship) they lose instant credibility. Try practicing being 100% honest with everything in your life. You'll see major improvements in your relationships, dating life, and self esteem. Lying destroys credibility and potential relationships. Learn to always be truthful in a sincere way.
8) Don't be Late
Being late to a date gets your date off on the wrong foot. If you know you are going to be late and can't help it, then call the person in advance. Tell them you are running late, when you'll be there, and that you are looking forward to seeing them.
9) Don't Make Decisions for Your Date
Some men think it's cool to order for their date, when in reality it is inconsiderate. Some women like it, but most don't. Like you, your date can think for himself/herself and when you take that away from them, the date may see you as being compulsive or controlling. And that's a turnoff.
10) Don't Eat Like You're Starving to Death
On a date, you should eat normal and with proper table manners. If your date sees someone who looks like they haven't eaten in weeks, it may make them wonder about your lifestyle (and income).
Dating is a lot of fun. You meet interesting people and can find that potential soul mate for life. By avoiding dating turnoffs, you improve your chances of getting a second date along with building dating habits that are healthy for you and your date.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Some Women are Like
courtesy : OnlineDatingMagazine.com
Poop.
The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
Comets.
All are beautiful, but they are cold as ice.
Computers.
Everything is stored in long-term memory for easy retrieval later on.
Cats.
They are cuddly and playful, but watch out when their claws come out!
Parrots.
They love to repeat things.
A game of Scrabble.
Their vocabulary is endless and always in play.
Christmas Trees.
The more gifts they have, the merrier they become.
Giraffes.
They beautiful to look at, but hard to keep.
Poop.
The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
Comets.
All are beautiful, but they are cold as ice.
Computers.
Everything is stored in long-term memory for easy retrieval later on.
Cats.
They are cuddly and playful, but watch out when their claws come out!
Parrots.
They love to repeat things.
A game of Scrabble.
Their vocabulary is endless and always in play.
Christmas Trees.
The more gifts they have, the merrier they become.
Giraffes.
They beautiful to look at, but hard to keep.
Saturday, November 10, 2007
5 Things Women Will Never Understand
Men are a misunderstood lot, which all in all is probably for the best. Women are better off not knowing that we eat with our hands the minute they leave the room or that we use their nail clippers to trim our nose hair. Better for them, better for us. Still, it's annoying that women spend more time and money trying to understand the minds of cats than they do wondering about what makes men tick. Which is why they'll never understand...
Our consuming need to own the biggest and most expensive version of just about everything.
Our compulsive desire to drive off-road vehicles in cities and use corkscrews that resemble offshore drilling equipment is well documented. As marketing targets, men are suckers for terms like "professional" or "industrial strength," because inside every man is the germ of every profession he ever imagined himself one day excelling at. Most of these purchases are harmless, little more than childish wish fulfillment played out at a higher testosterone level. But occasionally we go too far. The guy upstairs from me once boasted that he had a filter which filled his flat with "operating theater quality air." I kept him away from my surgical steel steak knives.
Why we are so bad at shopping.
We've never been trained to do it the right way. Supermarkets are like giant booby traps for males -- which is why if you send a man out to get eggs, sugar and bread, you should not be surprised if he returns home with a case of beer, a pair of jeans and a tree.
The reason why we don't like to discuss The Relationship.
Most of us will find any excuse to dodge those conversations that start with questions like "Are you really happy?" and "Where do you see us going?" A relationship is a delicate thing, like an antique clock, and we know what will happen if we start picking it apart. Often our reticence will result in a lengthy conversation about why we have trouble talking about... "The Relationship."
Why we think we can fix things.
Almost all men believe they can repair virtually anything with a little patience. In reality, we're only half right. Men are extremely good at taking things apart: whether it's a dishwasher or an antique clock, a man can break it down to its most basic components in no time. Unfortunately, this is where our expertise usually leaves off, and we're mostly satisfied with leaving bits and pieces spread all over newspaper on the kitchen table.
Men and video games.
Women cannot understand how grown men can waste huge chunks of their lives zapping things off a screen. When a man repeatedly rings his girlfriend to say he has to work late and routinely comes home at two in the morning all glassy eyed, she will usually take this as evidence of an affair -- when it's more likely that a pirated copy of Streetfighter II is making the rounds at the office.
Our consuming need to own the biggest and most expensive version of just about everything.
Our compulsive desire to drive off-road vehicles in cities and use corkscrews that resemble offshore drilling equipment is well documented. As marketing targets, men are suckers for terms like "professional" or "industrial strength," because inside every man is the germ of every profession he ever imagined himself one day excelling at. Most of these purchases are harmless, little more than childish wish fulfillment played out at a higher testosterone level. But occasionally we go too far. The guy upstairs from me once boasted that he had a filter which filled his flat with "operating theater quality air." I kept him away from my surgical steel steak knives.
Why we are so bad at shopping.
We've never been trained to do it the right way. Supermarkets are like giant booby traps for males -- which is why if you send a man out to get eggs, sugar and bread, you should not be surprised if he returns home with a case of beer, a pair of jeans and a tree.
The reason why we don't like to discuss The Relationship.
Most of us will find any excuse to dodge those conversations that start with questions like "Are you really happy?" and "Where do you see us going?" A relationship is a delicate thing, like an antique clock, and we know what will happen if we start picking it apart. Often our reticence will result in a lengthy conversation about why we have trouble talking about... "The Relationship."
Why we think we can fix things.
Almost all men believe they can repair virtually anything with a little patience. In reality, we're only half right. Men are extremely good at taking things apart: whether it's a dishwasher or an antique clock, a man can break it down to its most basic components in no time. Unfortunately, this is where our expertise usually leaves off, and we're mostly satisfied with leaving bits and pieces spread all over newspaper on the kitchen table.
Men and video games.
Women cannot understand how grown men can waste huge chunks of their lives zapping things off a screen. When a man repeatedly rings his girlfriend to say he has to work late and routinely comes home at two in the morning all glassy eyed, she will usually take this as evidence of an affair -- when it's more likely that a pirated copy of Streetfighter II is making the rounds at the office.
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Wedding Telegrams
The Bureau of Meteorology forcasts rainstorms so the bride can expect a few good inches overnight.
Love is a thousand miles long but comes in six inch installments.
"The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it.
"Confucious say man who sink into womans arms soon have arms in womans sink.
Sorry I cannot be at Wedding... Please send me a photo of Bride and Groom Mounted.
Easy on the throttle, steady on the gears, roll her over gently and She'll last for many years.
Don't keep him in the dog house too often or he might give his bone to the woman next door.
Treat him like a flower... grab him by the stalk.
If you don't want the Stork to come, Shoot in the air.
Go for it mate. We all did!
All the best from Mr and Mrs Farkin and all the Farkin kids.
She offered her honour, He honoured her offer, and all night he was on her and off her.
Don't Spring on the Inner-Spring this Spring or there will be an Off-Spring next Spring.
Hope you honeymoon is like a train ride through the Khyber Pass, One long hard route.
Please remember that Brandy makes you Randy, Whisky makes you Frisky, but its a good stiff Johnny Walker that makes you Pregnant.
Travel Agency to Bride: The groom's face leaves at midnight. Be on it.
Congratulations on the termination of your isolation and may I express an appreciation of your determination to end the desperation and frustration which has caused you so much consternation in giving you the inspiration to make a combination to bring an accumulation to the population.
Football coach to bride: If you've tried him in 18 positions and he's still no good, pull him off.
Treat the Bride like a new car, go easy for the first 500.
Love is a thousand miles long but comes in six inch installments.
"The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it.
"Confucious say man who sink into womans arms soon have arms in womans sink.
Sorry I cannot be at Wedding... Please send me a photo of Bride and Groom Mounted.
Easy on the throttle, steady on the gears, roll her over gently and She'll last for many years.
Don't keep him in the dog house too often or he might give his bone to the woman next door.
Treat him like a flower... grab him by the stalk.
If you don't want the Stork to come, Shoot in the air.
Go for it mate. We all did!
All the best from Mr and Mrs Farkin and all the Farkin kids.
She offered her honour, He honoured her offer, and all night he was on her and off her.
Don't Spring on the Inner-Spring this Spring or there will be an Off-Spring next Spring.
Hope you honeymoon is like a train ride through the Khyber Pass, One long hard route.
Please remember that Brandy makes you Randy, Whisky makes you Frisky, but its a good stiff Johnny Walker that makes you Pregnant.
Travel Agency to Bride: The groom's face leaves at midnight. Be on it.
Congratulations on the termination of your isolation and may I express an appreciation of your determination to end the desperation and frustration which has caused you so much consternation in giving you the inspiration to make a combination to bring an accumulation to the population.
Football coach to bride: If you've tried him in 18 positions and he's still no good, pull him off.
Treat the Bride like a new car, go easy for the first 500.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
What are parents doing to protect teens online?
Recent headlines about the discovery and removal of 29,000 registered sex offenders on MySpace have added fuel to the fiery debate about the safety of online social networks.
In an article that ran today in the Washington Post, data from our "Teens, Privacy and Online Social Networks" report was cited in reference to the type of information teens disclose on their profiles. Hemanshu Nigam, a former federal prosecutor who is now the chief security officer for MySpace, was quoted in the article as saying, "Parents are our first line of defense, and we want to empower them"
So, what are parents doing to protect their teens online? Here's a quick snapshot of some of the technical and non-technical measures parents use:
* Overall, 85% say they have rules about the kind of personal information their child can share online.
* 74% say the computer their child uses is in a public place in the home.
* 65% say they check up on their child's internet use after they go online.
* 53% use some type of filtering software.
* 45% use some type of monitoring software.
For more information about the steps parents are taking, please click here.
Article Courtesy : Mary Madden
In an article that ran today in the Washington Post, data from our "Teens, Privacy and Online Social Networks" report was cited in reference to the type of information teens disclose on their profiles. Hemanshu Nigam, a former federal prosecutor who is now the chief security officer for MySpace, was quoted in the article as saying, "Parents are our first line of defense, and we want to empower them"
So, what are parents doing to protect their teens online? Here's a quick snapshot of some of the technical and non-technical measures parents use:
* Overall, 85% say they have rules about the kind of personal information their child can share online.
* 74% say the computer their child uses is in a public place in the home.
* 65% say they check up on their child's internet use after they go online.
* 53% use some type of filtering software.
* 45% use some type of monitoring software.
For more information about the steps parents are taking, please click here.
Article Courtesy : Mary Madden
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Are our relationships defined by our online habits?
Everyone has a friend or two who takes that much longer to respond to emails because they just don't ever check their accounts, who don't want to join social networks and who never pop up on IM and gTalk. What happens when you fall in love with someone like that?
A friend in a serious relationship has declared herself as "single" on Facebook, the social networking site, not because she isn't madly in love with her boyfriend, but because her boyfriend won't create a Facebook profile. As a compulsive Facebook user (she updates her picture weekly and has at least 5 new posts on her wall every day), many of her social and family ties are maintained through communications via Facebook. In not joining Facebook, her boyfriend misses a part of life that is important to her.
In a more extreme example, a recent Wall Street Journal story profiled a man who is married to two women; one in Second Life and an entirely separate woman in the real world. The article describes how the man logs onto Second Life so he can spend hours on walks and motorcycle rides with his Second Life wife while the food left for him by his real-life wife remains untouched and unnoticed.
It seems to be an intolerable situation for the non-cyber wife. There is no question that her husband is neglecting their relationship in favor of his online life. The article does not offer substantial reasons for why she does not attempt to join him in his online domain—perhaps she is just not interested in cyber worlds. In hindsight, it would have been good to know that her future husband had a consuming interest/passion (way of life) that she does not share.
Will we soon be living in a world bifurcated by those who live a life fully immersed in the communicative and expressive tools the online world has to offer and those who deliberately choose not to communicate in those spaces?
Article Courtesy : Alexandra Rankin Macgill
Friday, October 5, 2007
A good date
These three teenage girls were roommates. One Friday night right after the semester started they all had all gone out on dates, and by chance all came home at about the same time.
The first one came in and said with a smug look on her face, "You know you've been on a good date when you come home with your hair all messed up."
The second one laughed at her and said, "No, no, that's nothing! You know you've been on a good date when you come home with your makeup all smeared."
The third one sat quiet with a blank stare on her face and didn't say a thing for a few minutes. Then she reached under her skirt, removed her panties and threw them against the wall, where they stuck with a loud thud!
She said, "Now that is a good date !!"
The first one came in and said with a smug look on her face, "You know you've been on a good date when you come home with your hair all messed up."
The second one laughed at her and said, "No, no, that's nothing! You know you've been on a good date when you come home with your makeup all smeared."
The third one sat quiet with a blank stare on her face and didn't say a thing for a few minutes. Then she reached under her skirt, removed her panties and threw them against the wall, where they stuck with a loud thud!
She said, "Now that is a good date !!"
Saturday, September 29, 2007
The biggest sex mistakes women often make
It’s no secret that many couples have mixed signals on exactly what their partner wants in the bedroom. To help sort out these “misunderstandings,” Ian Kerner, author of several books including “She Comes First,” and iVillage sex expert Tracey Cox addressed the most common mistakes women make.....
The sex mistakes women most often make:
1. Women don’t understand why men don’t like to cuddle.
Ian: After sex, men return to the pre-aroused state, women return to a semi-aroused state. For guys it’s a total system shutdown. We just want to crash, whereas women want to connect, cuddle, converse, even have more sex. Women shouldn’t assume that a guy is insensitive if he’s more inclined to snore than snuggle. He’s probably just shattered. Think of it as a compliment to the sex you just had.
Tracey: I disagree with this. I think men do like to cuddle! They’re just worried their partner might see it as weak and them as vulnerable. I think a lot of the time a man suggests sex, what they’re really after is the physical closeness a cuddle would provide
2. Women don’t understand the extent to which performance anxieties, self-esteem issues and body-image issues all affect male sex drive.
Ian: Absolutely. Guys have many of the same issues as women when it comes to sex: feeling out of shape, unattractive, not wanting to be seen naked during sex. I worked with one guy who always had to rush to put on his boxers after sex and could never cuddle naked. His wife didn’t know what was going on. Turned out he felt very “smallish” after sex.
Also, when guys are stressed out about work/financial issues, it often leads to a shutdown of desire. In both men and women, low self-esteem equals low desire.
Tracey: Men aren’t robots. They’re humans and worry about the same stuff females do. Also there’s pressure on men to provide good sex to women. They expect a lot from men in bed these days, and often expect men to be mind readers, rather than tell them what they want. I’m not surprised men get anxious and their libido dips.
3. Women think that men are always ready and willing to have sex any time, any place.
Ian: No way. As relationships progress over time, women can’t assume that guys are Pavlovian dogs that want to have sex every time you ring the bell. The mental turn-on becomes more crucial than the physical turn-on, and sexual desire begins in the brain, not the groin.
Tracey: They do! And they get all upset if he doesn’t get an instant erection just by looking at her! It’s true that young men probably are ready, willing and able at any point, but once a guy moves into his 20s, the pressure mounts in other areas of his life, like career, and he’s as capable of getting distracted by life’s problems as she is!
4. Women don’t understand how men can differentiate so easily between love and sex.
Ian: One of the reasons is that during sex, women produce lots of oxytocin, a hormone that stimulates a strong emotional connection. As a result, women are more emotionally integrated when it comes to sex. That’s why casual sex and hookups often backfire for lots of women. Guys produce little to no oxytocin, and can easily have sex without any sense of emotional connection. It’s sex with no emotional strings attached.
The sex mistakes women most often make:
1. Women don’t understand why men don’t like to cuddle.
Ian: After sex, men return to the pre-aroused state, women return to a semi-aroused state. For guys it’s a total system shutdown. We just want to crash, whereas women want to connect, cuddle, converse, even have more sex. Women shouldn’t assume that a guy is insensitive if he’s more inclined to snore than snuggle. He’s probably just shattered. Think of it as a compliment to the sex you just had.
Tracey: I disagree with this. I think men do like to cuddle! They’re just worried their partner might see it as weak and them as vulnerable. I think a lot of the time a man suggests sex, what they’re really after is the physical closeness a cuddle would provide
2. Women don’t understand the extent to which performance anxieties, self-esteem issues and body-image issues all affect male sex drive.
Ian: Absolutely. Guys have many of the same issues as women when it comes to sex: feeling out of shape, unattractive, not wanting to be seen naked during sex. I worked with one guy who always had to rush to put on his boxers after sex and could never cuddle naked. His wife didn’t know what was going on. Turned out he felt very “smallish” after sex.
Also, when guys are stressed out about work/financial issues, it often leads to a shutdown of desire. In both men and women, low self-esteem equals low desire.
Tracey: Men aren’t robots. They’re humans and worry about the same stuff females do. Also there’s pressure on men to provide good sex to women. They expect a lot from men in bed these days, and often expect men to be mind readers, rather than tell them what they want. I’m not surprised men get anxious and their libido dips.
3. Women think that men are always ready and willing to have sex any time, any place.
Ian: No way. As relationships progress over time, women can’t assume that guys are Pavlovian dogs that want to have sex every time you ring the bell. The mental turn-on becomes more crucial than the physical turn-on, and sexual desire begins in the brain, not the groin.
Tracey: They do! And they get all upset if he doesn’t get an instant erection just by looking at her! It’s true that young men probably are ready, willing and able at any point, but once a guy moves into his 20s, the pressure mounts in other areas of his life, like career, and he’s as capable of getting distracted by life’s problems as she is!
4. Women don’t understand how men can differentiate so easily between love and sex.
Ian: One of the reasons is that during sex, women produce lots of oxytocin, a hormone that stimulates a strong emotional connection. As a result, women are more emotionally integrated when it comes to sex. That’s why casual sex and hookups often backfire for lots of women. Guys produce little to no oxytocin, and can easily have sex without any sense of emotional connection. It’s sex with no emotional strings attached.
Friday, September 14, 2007
Tips for Dealing With Blind Dates
When you are going on a blind date it is a good idea to make it a short one. Go out for coffee or drinks, at the most go for lunch. If you keep the date short then there will be less pressure on your date. This will allow you to scope each other out without the need to be worried about the appropriateness of who should pay the bill or maintaining a long conversation.
Plan to go to a public place with people around but not too crowded or loud. This way you can be safe and have enough privacy for a conversation without anyone’s voice getting drowned out. Of course, it’s a good idea to keep away from your regular hangouts so you don’t have to chat with your friends. Focus only on the date to learn about him/her and help you decide if a second date is worth it. A short period of time in a safe yet private place is perfect for a blind date.
Maintain a balanced attitude in your conversation. Don’t be sarcastic or condescending towards others. You don’t know what your date may or may not find offensive. Plus you will seem crude and disrespectful. If you are a guy and make suggestive comments then you will make your date very uncomfortable and it’s unlikely you will see her again. It’s also a good idea to keep away from controversial views such as views or organized religion or the state of politics unless you have already been discussing such things online or something like that before you meet your blind date.
The most important tip on conversation etiquette is to listen to your date. Ask questions to sound interested and to get to know about your date. Preparing a list of questions before hand might be a good idea to keep the conversation going. Ask open ended questions to learn what they value as this helps you understand their core. For example, what do you most enjoy? Or what makes you passionate? Or why do you like your present job? Etc. If you focus on specific questions such as asking about the years spent somewhere or how many vacations he/she takes, then there is little room for your date to provide information about interests them in their own words so you can get to know them better.
Remember to keep basic courtesy at all times. Keep your cell phone off unless you are ‘on-call’ in which case let your date know that you will ignore all calls except emergencies. Don’t expect too much from this date. It is a blind date so it will probably lead to nothing but it could lead to you making a good friend or even a fulfilling relationship. However, it’s best to go out just to have a good time getting to know someone new and that is it.
Lastly, make up your own mind about your date. If your friend is setting you up on this blind date, don’t ask questions about your date. Your friend’s opinions could bias you in one direction or another. It is best to prepare yourself and meet your date with a clean slate, so you can get to how you feel about him or her. Always read the top bestsellers on relationships and dating so you are up to date to the psychology of the opposite sex so you don’t sabotage yourself to faulty assumptions.
Learn while you date and you will have the most fun and educational experience you can.
Article courtesy : http://dating-and-seduction-tips.blogspot.com/
Plan to go to a public place with people around but not too crowded or loud. This way you can be safe and have enough privacy for a conversation without anyone’s voice getting drowned out. Of course, it’s a good idea to keep away from your regular hangouts so you don’t have to chat with your friends. Focus only on the date to learn about him/her and help you decide if a second date is worth it. A short period of time in a safe yet private place is perfect for a blind date.
Maintain a balanced attitude in your conversation. Don’t be sarcastic or condescending towards others. You don’t know what your date may or may not find offensive. Plus you will seem crude and disrespectful. If you are a guy and make suggestive comments then you will make your date very uncomfortable and it’s unlikely you will see her again. It’s also a good idea to keep away from controversial views such as views or organized religion or the state of politics unless you have already been discussing such things online or something like that before you meet your blind date.
The most important tip on conversation etiquette is to listen to your date. Ask questions to sound interested and to get to know about your date. Preparing a list of questions before hand might be a good idea to keep the conversation going. Ask open ended questions to learn what they value as this helps you understand their core. For example, what do you most enjoy? Or what makes you passionate? Or why do you like your present job? Etc. If you focus on specific questions such as asking about the years spent somewhere or how many vacations he/she takes, then there is little room for your date to provide information about interests them in their own words so you can get to know them better.
Remember to keep basic courtesy at all times. Keep your cell phone off unless you are ‘on-call’ in which case let your date know that you will ignore all calls except emergencies. Don’t expect too much from this date. It is a blind date so it will probably lead to nothing but it could lead to you making a good friend or even a fulfilling relationship. However, it’s best to go out just to have a good time getting to know someone new and that is it.
Lastly, make up your own mind about your date. If your friend is setting you up on this blind date, don’t ask questions about your date. Your friend’s opinions could bias you in one direction or another. It is best to prepare yourself and meet your date with a clean slate, so you can get to how you feel about him or her. Always read the top bestsellers on relationships and dating so you are up to date to the psychology of the opposite sex so you don’t sabotage yourself to faulty assumptions.
Learn while you date and you will have the most fun and educational experience you can.
Article courtesy : http://dating-and-seduction-tips.blogspot.com/
Sunday, September 2, 2007
Tips for dealing with bad dates
Spending a whole night with someone you can’t bear to be with can feel like an eternity and is one of the worst ways to spend a date.
Bad dates can occur by going out with someone because the person is wrong for you or the date activity itself is not entertaining. Some dates go bad because of external circumstances such as bad weather or traffic jams, but these dates can become ‘shared experiences’ which can lead to a bonding that comes from shared hardship. So bad external conditions can be ignored as a bad date as the situation couldn’t be avoided and it doesn’t involve a personality clash.
One of the main problems with bad dates is that you are partly responsible. Why? Simply because you agreed to go out on this date to begin with. You could have agreed to this date as a favor for a friend or a family member but you said yes when you could have said no. Of course, once you have been on a bad date you will be a lot more cautious which gives bad dates a steep learning curve. So next time you will be sure to ask about this person or just say no if you can’t get much information. This will save you from getting stuck with a workaholic who can only talk of work, or someone who only talks about themselves or even a person who keeps quit making you wonder why they want to date to begin with. If you knew this person before going out then it shows that you really didn’t know them or that the date changes this person in some way so you will be more careful about accepting a date from someone in a similar situation in the future.
If you like the person you dated but got bored with the date itself you should consider what sort of suggestions you made yourself for this date. Did you agree to this particular dates venue or were you even asked for your opinion. If your dates didn’t ask you about how you felt about this dates activity then you have to consider if this person just ignored your opinion or just doesn’t know you very well. If your opinion was ignored then you have to consider if this person is the right person for you to date at this time or were they just nervous about pleasing you and you should give them another chance. Keep in mind that everybody has their own likes and dislikes and so if you got taken to a date venue that you have had a bad experience with so you can’t enjoy yourself in such a place, then this is something your date could not have known.
Sometimes it is best if you speak up about what kind of date you would like to go on. After you speak up, if your date still doesn’t ask you for your feedback you can safely avoid them as going out with them will most likely lead to bad dates.
To keep bad dates to a minimum make sure you give your feedback on what dates venues you are interested in. Ask your date about the kind of things they like to do and make a suggestion about a date venue you both might like.
If you can’t stand somebody very much and are not sure if you can enjoy a long date then make sure you pick a fun date venue so your date is not as important to your enjoyment of the date, as say an intimate dinner would be. If you are careful about who you go out with and where you go out then you can keep bad dates to a bare minimum.
Article Courtesy : Nicoles blog
Bad dates can occur by going out with someone because the person is wrong for you or the date activity itself is not entertaining. Some dates go bad because of external circumstances such as bad weather or traffic jams, but these dates can become ‘shared experiences’ which can lead to a bonding that comes from shared hardship. So bad external conditions can be ignored as a bad date as the situation couldn’t be avoided and it doesn’t involve a personality clash.
One of the main problems with bad dates is that you are partly responsible. Why? Simply because you agreed to go out on this date to begin with. You could have agreed to this date as a favor for a friend or a family member but you said yes when you could have said no. Of course, once you have been on a bad date you will be a lot more cautious which gives bad dates a steep learning curve. So next time you will be sure to ask about this person or just say no if you can’t get much information. This will save you from getting stuck with a workaholic who can only talk of work, or someone who only talks about themselves or even a person who keeps quit making you wonder why they want to date to begin with. If you knew this person before going out then it shows that you really didn’t know them or that the date changes this person in some way so you will be more careful about accepting a date from someone in a similar situation in the future.
If you like the person you dated but got bored with the date itself you should consider what sort of suggestions you made yourself for this date. Did you agree to this particular dates venue or were you even asked for your opinion. If your dates didn’t ask you about how you felt about this dates activity then you have to consider if this person just ignored your opinion or just doesn’t know you very well. If your opinion was ignored then you have to consider if this person is the right person for you to date at this time or were they just nervous about pleasing you and you should give them another chance. Keep in mind that everybody has their own likes and dislikes and so if you got taken to a date venue that you have had a bad experience with so you can’t enjoy yourself in such a place, then this is something your date could not have known.
Sometimes it is best if you speak up about what kind of date you would like to go on. After you speak up, if your date still doesn’t ask you for your feedback you can safely avoid them as going out with them will most likely lead to bad dates.
To keep bad dates to a minimum make sure you give your feedback on what dates venues you are interested in. Ask your date about the kind of things they like to do and make a suggestion about a date venue you both might like.
If you can’t stand somebody very much and are not sure if you can enjoy a long date then make sure you pick a fun date venue so your date is not as important to your enjoyment of the date, as say an intimate dinner would be. If you are careful about who you go out with and where you go out then you can keep bad dates to a bare minimum.
Article Courtesy : Nicoles blog
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Why Thirty Is No Longer The Prime Of Life
Women in their thirties who appear to "have it all" compared with previous generations are in fact exhausted and unhappy, a survey has claimed.
The demands of being a homemaker, mother and holding down a job is leaving them "physically and emotionally" wrecked.
Lack of sleep and eating "on the hoof" rather than sitting down to regular family meals add to the problems of trying to do too much.
Nearly half of female thirtysomethings - typified by Renee Zellweger in Bridget Jones's Diary - regularly call in sick at work because they are under so much stress, the study found.
The Female Health Survey revealed that women find the 30s by far the toughest decade.
Nearly nine out of 10 said they frequently feel tired, with 59% saying they feel tired all the time, and only a quarter get enough sleep.
Eight out of 10 of women said they do not have enough time to eat properly, while 31% admitted that they snack all the time.
The result is that women in their thirties and forties regularly suffer from headaches, chest infections, heart palpitations or eczema.
Marina Crook, the editor of Top Sante magazine, which commissioned the survey, was unsurprised by the results.
"Tiredness and stress are the ailments of our age and combined with a poor diet they cause low immunity and ill-health," she said.
And she warns that the problems continue into later life, with working lives lasting longer than ever before.
"Our thirties and forties are so hectic, that by the time we reach our fifties, sixties and seventies - the time we should be more freed up to enjoy life - our health has already been seriously affected."
Article Coutesy : Sky News
The demands of being a homemaker, mother and holding down a job is leaving them "physically and emotionally" wrecked.
Lack of sleep and eating "on the hoof" rather than sitting down to regular family meals add to the problems of trying to do too much.
Nearly half of female thirtysomethings - typified by Renee Zellweger in Bridget Jones's Diary - regularly call in sick at work because they are under so much stress, the study found.
The Female Health Survey revealed that women find the 30s by far the toughest decade.
Nearly nine out of 10 said they frequently feel tired, with 59% saying they feel tired all the time, and only a quarter get enough sleep.
Eight out of 10 of women said they do not have enough time to eat properly, while 31% admitted that they snack all the time.
The result is that women in their thirties and forties regularly suffer from headaches, chest infections, heart palpitations or eczema.
Marina Crook, the editor of Top Sante magazine, which commissioned the survey, was unsurprised by the results.
"Tiredness and stress are the ailments of our age and combined with a poor diet they cause low immunity and ill-health," she said.
And she warns that the problems continue into later life, with working lives lasting longer than ever before.
"Our thirties and forties are so hectic, that by the time we reach our fifties, sixties and seventies - the time we should be more freed up to enjoy life - our health has already been seriously affected."
Article Coutesy : Sky News
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Dating and Relationship Tips For Men
A woman enjoys her man’s masculinity – his inner strength.
To feel this strength a woman tests her man whether you have just begun dating or have been in a relationship for a while. Some of it is conscious, some unconscious, but all of it is to see if she can move you from your center and make you feel frustrated. She does this so she can feel how confident and strong you are. If you maintain your sense of humor and your affection then you have shown that your moods can not be manipulated by her behavior. A feminine woman loves feeling this sort of strength in her man.
Many men don’t have a clue that women naturally test them. So they assume that the woman testing them is nuts or just plain not interested. That couldn’t be further from the truth. The very fact that she’s testing you, by trying to bother you, shows she cares!
The next thing to be aware of concerning the woman you’re dating, is her moods. A woman’s main priority is the flow of love in a relationship. When she doesn’t feel love her moods seem to change quickly. While she is angry or irritated the words she uses is either designed to hurt or take control. As long as there is no love flowing. There is not point in paying attention to her words. The words are important only as foar as they reflect her mood.
Your first task whether you are dating or in a relationship is to break her negative mood with love or humor. When her laughs or smiles and the love and affection is present in her mood only then do her words have direct meaning.
Most men try to make peace with the woman they are dating by trying to solve the problems represented by her words this will be ineffective as her words are essentially designed to express her mood. More often than not her words will have nothing to do with the actual problem.
All you need to do to dissolve her mood is to make her laugh.
If you have just began dating than you use verbal humor or you can make a fool of yourself. If the intimacy is deeper (than it generally is at the beginning of dating) then you can grab her and blow on her neck making funny sounds, or dance with her looking deep into her eyes, or even strip down naked and start dancing! As long as you can break her mood with laughter and affection she will balance herself. THEN you can talk to her and her words will be true and you can take these words seriously.
In other words, be sure that love is flowing between you two before you take her words seriously.
Article Courtesy : http://dating-and-seduction-tips.blogspot.com
To feel this strength a woman tests her man whether you have just begun dating or have been in a relationship for a while. Some of it is conscious, some unconscious, but all of it is to see if she can move you from your center and make you feel frustrated. She does this so she can feel how confident and strong you are. If you maintain your sense of humor and your affection then you have shown that your moods can not be manipulated by her behavior. A feminine woman loves feeling this sort of strength in her man.
Many men don’t have a clue that women naturally test them. So they assume that the woman testing them is nuts or just plain not interested. That couldn’t be further from the truth. The very fact that she’s testing you, by trying to bother you, shows she cares!
The next thing to be aware of concerning the woman you’re dating, is her moods. A woman’s main priority is the flow of love in a relationship. When she doesn’t feel love her moods seem to change quickly. While she is angry or irritated the words she uses is either designed to hurt or take control. As long as there is no love flowing. There is not point in paying attention to her words. The words are important only as foar as they reflect her mood.
Your first task whether you are dating or in a relationship is to break her negative mood with love or humor. When her laughs or smiles and the love and affection is present in her mood only then do her words have direct meaning.
Most men try to make peace with the woman they are dating by trying to solve the problems represented by her words this will be ineffective as her words are essentially designed to express her mood. More often than not her words will have nothing to do with the actual problem.
All you need to do to dissolve her mood is to make her laugh.
If you have just began dating than you use verbal humor or you can make a fool of yourself. If the intimacy is deeper (than it generally is at the beginning of dating) then you can grab her and blow on her neck making funny sounds, or dance with her looking deep into her eyes, or even strip down naked and start dancing! As long as you can break her mood with laughter and affection she will balance herself. THEN you can talk to her and her words will be true and you can take these words seriously.
In other words, be sure that love is flowing between you two before you take her words seriously.
Article Courtesy : http://dating-and-seduction-tips.blogspot.com
Saturday, August 4, 2007
Privacy in online dating
Since dating sites utilize technology that allows impersonal communication, people who engage in online dating could enjoy their privacy.
Many dating sites are certified and claim that they can easily safeguard the member's information against harmful elements, from viruses to prohibited users. Members can be rest assured that confidential data about themselves like their real identity, contact details, and present whereabouts cannot be instantly viewed by other people.
Likewise, this privacy feature also benefits the part of the person looking for a date in that his or her identity is also kept private or anonymous, as he or she browses through the profiles of chosen date candidates. To initiate a conversation with a date prospect, the person simply has to gain access by becoming a member and formally invite the prospect to a correspondence. Once the communication begins and endures, it is up to either or both persons to discern whether or not to unveil their true personalities. But showing real identities is not normally a prerequisite of dating sites and that feature makes it the biggest advantage of these sites.
Since the internet has a wide reach, spanning regions across the planet, the possibility of finding a match through dating sites is huge. The wide coverage of these sites, considering that they are not virtually selective of their members, offers numerous options for the regular female to look for her date, for example. Options are better than none, and in a way, this could be both an advantage and a disadvantage for some sides.
For people who are actively seeking for their date and browsing through the profiles in dating sites, having options means that there are more prospects out there to fall back on, just in case the primary choice does not work out. Of course, the selection process could be more lengthy and tedious, but in the end, surely, active date seekers are taking this more as an advantage than as a disadvantage.
As for people who are looking for dates yet would rather be content having their profiles posted online in dating sites, more options mean more competition. As such, they would need to enhance their profiles by posting more interesting and perhaps, sexy photos or use deliberately captivating (or exaggerated) content to make their profiles more appealing.
Speaking of content, dating sites also allow the application of various technological resources people now have within their reach. With these, members can opt to have their pictures and photos displayed in the site. They can also use a web camera or webcam to produce real-time appearances and moving introductions to other people visiting the site. For men and women who value creativity and innovation, the utilization of visual effects, particularly text enhancement and graphic design tools, are helpful in bringing out their true nature and hopefully, would add their attractiveness to their prospects. In more ways than one, these technologies encourage a sincere environment where members are free to tell others information about himself or herself and are honest enough to communicate with one another until they are ready to date.
Although the notion that dating sites are expensive is arguable to some, they definitely provide a more immediate and convenient venue for meeting date prospects compared to physical locations. Online dating enables the date searcher to hook up with as many people as he or she wants at the same time for just a certain amount, if applicable and depending on the conditions of the site.
This function serves as an aid, not just in initiating a conversation with the desired person, but also in developing an actual relationship with that individual. People who are shy in person might in fact be considered good talkers and listeners, if not already experts in breaking the ice, in the cyberspace realm. This may be attributed to their practice of communicating with a multitude of people in an instant or in the shortest time possible, hence their conversational skills are being continuously developed as they hunt for their dates.
Since the internet is available all the time, people who get involved in online dating can contact their prospects 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Thus, the talking and the sharing of ideas and interests can be conducted even in the wee hours of the morning. Although the internet is an immediate medium for communication, people are not pressured into dealing with their date prospects because there is no given time frame for meeting and getting together. They can easily send or receive emails and instant message each other any time of the day. In short, access and all-time connectivity is never a question when it comes to online dating.
As mentioned previously, dating sites basically know no limits when it comes to the personalities, gender, and culture of people who join them. These sites are open to anyone who is willing to experience a unique kind of dating and interaction. Some dating sites have restrictions when it comes to age, but other than that, these sites make its members conscious of the differences as well as similarities of one another. In a way, dating sites go beyond taboos because they enable certain demographies to stretch their abilities and show what they might otherwise deny in person.
For example, some women may find dating sites to be liberating and empowering because through these sites, they are able to muster enough courage to ask men out for dates, whereas in real life, they just sit and wait for their Prince Charming to gallop by and take them away. Like in the case of men, dating sites also lessen the humiliating experience for women when their partners say “no” to them. Also, some women who may not be confident enough to merely meet new friends or people out of their circles may find dating sites also rewarding because the reach of these sites go beyond racial and cultural borders. Women also need not worry about whatever inhibitions they may have in person because the people they meet would not primarily take into account what they look like, which is one of the things their male prospects normally put a bearing on.
Many dating sites are certified and claim that they can easily safeguard the member's information against harmful elements, from viruses to prohibited users. Members can be rest assured that confidential data about themselves like their real identity, contact details, and present whereabouts cannot be instantly viewed by other people.
Likewise, this privacy feature also benefits the part of the person looking for a date in that his or her identity is also kept private or anonymous, as he or she browses through the profiles of chosen date candidates. To initiate a conversation with a date prospect, the person simply has to gain access by becoming a member and formally invite the prospect to a correspondence. Once the communication begins and endures, it is up to either or both persons to discern whether or not to unveil their true personalities. But showing real identities is not normally a prerequisite of dating sites and that feature makes it the biggest advantage of these sites.
Since the internet has a wide reach, spanning regions across the planet, the possibility of finding a match through dating sites is huge. The wide coverage of these sites, considering that they are not virtually selective of their members, offers numerous options for the regular female to look for her date, for example. Options are better than none, and in a way, this could be both an advantage and a disadvantage for some sides.
For people who are actively seeking for their date and browsing through the profiles in dating sites, having options means that there are more prospects out there to fall back on, just in case the primary choice does not work out. Of course, the selection process could be more lengthy and tedious, but in the end, surely, active date seekers are taking this more as an advantage than as a disadvantage.
As for people who are looking for dates yet would rather be content having their profiles posted online in dating sites, more options mean more competition. As such, they would need to enhance their profiles by posting more interesting and perhaps, sexy photos or use deliberately captivating (or exaggerated) content to make their profiles more appealing.
Speaking of content, dating sites also allow the application of various technological resources people now have within their reach. With these, members can opt to have their pictures and photos displayed in the site. They can also use a web camera or webcam to produce real-time appearances and moving introductions to other people visiting the site. For men and women who value creativity and innovation, the utilization of visual effects, particularly text enhancement and graphic design tools, are helpful in bringing out their true nature and hopefully, would add their attractiveness to their prospects. In more ways than one, these technologies encourage a sincere environment where members are free to tell others information about himself or herself and are honest enough to communicate with one another until they are ready to date.
Although the notion that dating sites are expensive is arguable to some, they definitely provide a more immediate and convenient venue for meeting date prospects compared to physical locations. Online dating enables the date searcher to hook up with as many people as he or she wants at the same time for just a certain amount, if applicable and depending on the conditions of the site.
This function serves as an aid, not just in initiating a conversation with the desired person, but also in developing an actual relationship with that individual. People who are shy in person might in fact be considered good talkers and listeners, if not already experts in breaking the ice, in the cyberspace realm. This may be attributed to their practice of communicating with a multitude of people in an instant or in the shortest time possible, hence their conversational skills are being continuously developed as they hunt for their dates.
Since the internet is available all the time, people who get involved in online dating can contact their prospects 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Thus, the talking and the sharing of ideas and interests can be conducted even in the wee hours of the morning. Although the internet is an immediate medium for communication, people are not pressured into dealing with their date prospects because there is no given time frame for meeting and getting together. They can easily send or receive emails and instant message each other any time of the day. In short, access and all-time connectivity is never a question when it comes to online dating.
As mentioned previously, dating sites basically know no limits when it comes to the personalities, gender, and culture of people who join them. These sites are open to anyone who is willing to experience a unique kind of dating and interaction. Some dating sites have restrictions when it comes to age, but other than that, these sites make its members conscious of the differences as well as similarities of one another. In a way, dating sites go beyond taboos because they enable certain demographies to stretch their abilities and show what they might otherwise deny in person.
For example, some women may find dating sites to be liberating and empowering because through these sites, they are able to muster enough courage to ask men out for dates, whereas in real life, they just sit and wait for their Prince Charming to gallop by and take them away. Like in the case of men, dating sites also lessen the humiliating experience for women when their partners say “no” to them. Also, some women who may not be confident enough to merely meet new friends or people out of their circles may find dating sites also rewarding because the reach of these sites go beyond racial and cultural borders. Women also need not worry about whatever inhibitions they may have in person because the people they meet would not primarily take into account what they look like, which is one of the things their male prospects normally put a bearing on.
Monday, July 30, 2007
Outsourcing And The Desi Dream
When Gautam had come to US to do his Masters in Computer Science he had the standard immigrant dream - dollars, a house, two cars and two kids. Well not quite. Sure he wanted all these things but what he wanted most of all was to live his fantasy nurtured through years of watching MTV and Channel V. In his dreams, life in US was a never-ending hedonistic pleasure-trip of bikini-clad girls dancing on the beach and partying the night away in a psychedelically lit disco. And so the day he got admission into graduate school in US he thought that the gateway to heaven had finally opened.
However the educational system brought him back to reality with harsh lashings of its whip. He found out soon enough that the only thing he could play around with was the Linux kernel, the only promiscuous mode he would ever see would be in computer networks.
Infact, he and a couple of his friends took the campus bus and went to a bar to pick up some chicks. All that happened was that they sat there, drank alone, stared at each other, ogled the ladies who did not seem to even look at them through their cascading locks of gold and came back even more frustrated than before.
His friends still went to bars regularly; one of them even took the phone number of a girl he danced with on New Year's but well that was all they could do. Gautam after the few days had stopped frequenting bars and pubs as there was no way he could ever get noticed. Sadly, he realized that when it comes to hitting on chicks in bars, it does matter if you are brown.
And so Gautam stayed in a loft with 2 other desis while the American students downstairs would start partying from Thursday night he had to be contented with peering down at the girls making out with the guys on the porch and listening to the cries of passion emanating through the thin wooden walls while he ate his vegetable chow mein from his small white bowl.
He had tried chatting with girls on the Net but he could not trust anything on chat as it was obvious that the girls who wanted to talk hot were not really girls at all. And the girls, the very few that there were, would be immensely boring and trying to make a friendship of the long term variety - something that Gautam did not have the time for.
I mean after nights of endless coding he reasoned that talking about his family, his hobbies and his zodiac sign was a waste of effort when all he wanted was to get down to business.
One night he had returned from school at 2:30. The code had core-dumped without any explanation, his advisor was breathing down his neck, and the Chinese TA had put a B on an assignment unfairly. A night like any other night he thought as Gautam threw his head back on the torn couch and tried to collect his thoughts. His apartment mates Ajay and Vikas had gone shopping in the evening and God knows where they were so late maybe sleeping.
In a reflex action, he started surfing the channels on his TV - was there anything good on?
All infomercials, the fat burning grille, the get-rich-by-selling-real-estate, the amazingly loaded laptop that will be sold out in 10 minutes - Nothing new and then something caught his eye.
Are you tired? asked a blonde and that too a gorgeous piece of work.
Yes he was Gautam thought. Most definitely.
She was then joined by another bountiful babe who pouted: Are you lonely?
Oh Yes, tell me about it.
Another brunette with a generous display piped in: We are waiting for your call big boy.
Then a voice-over said encouragingly: We have real girls in your area who want to meet you and have a good time. Call 1-900-HOTTIES to blow your mind.
A cut to the three girls now slithering among themselves: What are you waiting for? Call 1-900-HOTTIES
The phone lay on the adjoining couch. Gautam looked at it longingly. Was this the real way to meet local girls? Of course not, this is a phone sex line; he knew all about them. He flipped the channel again - a Discovery channel special on the mating habits of the Siberian bear. Why not give it a try ?
What if the girls from his university were doing it for money? What if something happens and at the worst, there would be a real girl talking dirty on the other side - just the perfect arrangement. No aggravation of conversation, just jump to the good parts, no threat of rejection, total confidentiality and he realized that the rate on the ad was $1.49 per minute. Besides, it said that the first 3 minutes were also free. If he kept it down to 10 minutes then it could be a deal.
He had just been paid and come to thinks of it he owed something to himself.
He hesitated a bit and then his hand reached out to the phone. An automated husky voice greeted him and asked him to punch in his credit card number. Gautam thought again should he go ahead?
If he did so, there was no turning back. But it is said that one who hesitates, definitely loses. So he punched in his MasterCard. A reassuring voice told him that his card was being authorized and that he would not be charged till 3 minutes into a conversation with a real girl. Gautam liked the sound of that-nothing sleazy, full and fair business. In India sleaze means getting ripped off but here in US there is honor in smut. One of the many things he liked about the country.
A real female voice came on: Hi sir how would you like to be addressed?
Gautam asked: Am I being charged from now?
The friendly voice replied: No sir not yet. I am the pleasure facilitator (what a beautiful job Gautam thought). My job is to know a little bit about what you would like so that we can give you a fantastic experience. Yes sir how would you like to be addressed? Just the first name only sir.
Gautam thought of providing a false identity...but then he wanted to be addressed by his own name. It was more personal and heck who would ever know? But then again from his experiences in the bars he thought better of it and replied in his best American accent (which was pretty good)
Bob
So Bob! What kind of girl would you like: Swedish exchange-student, Japanese schoolgirl, Russian dominatrix, Vietnamese submissive, all-American cheerleader or an ebony pleasure-queen?
Wow Gautam thought-a buffet of succulent ladies. He thought for a while and said: How about an all-American cheerleader?
Sure Bob. We aim to please at 1-900-HOTTIES. Please wait why we redirect our call to your dream date. Your 3 minutes begin after she picks up the phone. Again congratulation on your choice...and enjoy
Gautam waited with bated breath. This sure beats the hell out of hanging endlessly in places where none even looked back at you. Instant, hassle-free gratification. In a few seconds he would be speaking to an All-American cheerleader
Click...and then an undecipherable voice...apparently a unmistakable Southern accent...Gautam could only make out a howdy partner and the rest of her words were lost in a mumble. Gautam in his American accent kept on repeating... Could you please try and speak a bit louder? But he could make neither head nor tail of what the girl was drawling. And in the corner of his brain the clock was ticking - the free minutes would be over in a flash and he had not yet understood what the hell she was trying to say.
And then straining to hear he could make out the background sound...despite the very thick Texan accent there was something very familiar with the ambient noise which was also contributing to her voice being drowned out. And finally he realized that sound; the unmistakable drone of heavy traffic and riotous blowing of horns. In which country are horns blown like this?
India! The penny dropped. The cheats had transferred his call to India! Texan beauty indeed... Gautam's voice rose - Has his call been Outsourced to India?
The voice at the other end immediately changed. A beautiful voice spoke in clear English: I apologise sir, but yes, your call has been outsourced to India.
Actually to keep operating costs down, the company has had to globalize these calls. Sir this is just a fantasy-I hope you understand, our parent company, has no legal obligation to provide you with the all-American girl you asked for. I apologize for my accent: I normally do the Japanese and the Vietnamese girl, but the girl who does the all-American cheerleader has just quit her job and I apologise profusely on behalf of the company
She continued with an amazingly sexy voice...However truth be told I am from India - the land of Kamasutra where the girls are as lush as the mighty Ganga and know how to please - I can be quite a handful. So tell me sir have you ever heard of the “flying monkey” position? Allow me to enlighten you in graphic details!
Gautam's indignation had been replaced by sympathy. Poor Indian girl must be some college kid forced to do this because of financial constraints. Which Indian girl would ever do such things on her own? And the teary voice of the girl had aroused the man in Gautam - poor lady. It was not her fault that the Texas girl quit. If this was an American he would abuse the poor Indian and hang up. But not Gautam. Even though he wanted to settle in US, he still loved his country. And its girls. And something about this girl's helplessness also excited him. He wondered why.
Gautam put on his best chivalrous knight tone. Reverting to his own accent he said: Hi I am Gautam not Bob. I am an Indian student too so you need not tell me about the Kamasutra - I live by it (well a white lie but as she said this was all a fantasy!).
The girl laughed a beautiful cadence - This girl really had an amazingly sexy voice.
She said: Hi Gautam, I am Monica and am all excited to meet you...Now, if I may ask you, where abouts in India do you come from?
Gautam glanced at the watch. Goddamn this was costing him plenty and they had not even talked a bit of what he had paid for. But he liked this-actually this conversation was much more exciting than a few minutes of mechanized huffing and puffing that he would have hoped to get.
Baroda, he replied.
Hey Baroda - that's cool I am from Baroda too, her voice rose a level. They have found a common ground, a connection source. You must be one of those geniuses who go to US after their engineering. Gautam smiled self-contentedly.
Gautam then launched into a rant about how lonely he was. At least that would serve as a justification for dialing a sex chat line. The girl was more than understanding about Gautam's loneliness. So don't you have a girl friend there? Some hot blonde in US who can look after your needs?
Gautam sighed. Of course not, or why else would he be calling here?
Well no Monica. I prefer brown skin - fairness turns me off.
The musical voice cooed. So Gautam do you have any girl friend in India?
Gautam was feeling exceedingly honest. Somewhere subconsciously he was falling in lust with this goddess of love. And he needed to start this relationship by making a clean breast of things
No Monica I do not. There was a girl in my locality I used to love and lust.
Monica giggled: Tell me about her.
Gautam was breathing noticeably heavier now. Oh god he thought, this lady knew how to press the right buttons. He then launched into a lurid description of a girl who lived in the same housing society and whom he had spent countless nights thinking about and was soon lost in explicit details of her anatomical attributes. Gautam thought of how delectably perverted this conversation had become but what amazed him was how accepting and understanding this Indian girl was. It was another matter that he was doing All the hot talking, the girl was merely encouraging him to go on and in the end he would have to foot the bill. Which Gautam realized must be quite high now. But he was no longer thinking with his head.
Wow Gautam. Your dream girl seems to be right out of the Khajuraho temple so is she the only one?
Gautam was talking in an impassioned whisper by now. She had an even hotter elder sister I have often fantasized about both of them together
The girl giggled again: So what were their names? And tell me about the fantasies involving both of them? Shweta and Anila - Well there was this one time when... The girl's tone changed a bit: Shweta and Anila Gupta
Was this one of them? Gautam's head was now turning cartwheels. Could it really be that one of the two goddesses was actually a phone sex operator? And that he had been talking dirty to one of those unattainable fairies for so long? Gautam excitedly replied: Yes, yes, do you know them?
Suddenly the line became silent. Had he been disconnected or had the girl been so ashamed of being found out that she had disconnected? Oh no! please no! as he yelled...Hello! Hello! Are you there?
The voice had now undergone a metamorphosis. Bastard...she shouted...I know you... You are that pot bellied idiot who used to stay in No 24 and would try to peek into our house...Go tell your dirty ideas to your own sister you bastard...Shameless idiot..One more thought about the two of them, I shall gouge out your hungry eyes and feed them to the crows and twist your little thingie out and leave it among the green chillies to dry... You got that! Scumbag?
Your parents sent you to US to study and this is how you spend your time there - Shameless Monkey.
A click of the telephone disconnecting and another automated voice... Thank you for using 1-900-HOTTIES. Your credit card has been charged $98.78 including call time, tax and state surcharges. Thank you once again and we hope to do business with you in the future.
Ninety Nine Dollars - that was almost what he spent on a month's grocery. But cash was the last thing on Gautam's mind as he sat on the couch- His head in his hands. He had recognized the voice that had berated him in the end. It was Kokila Aunty, the mother of Shweta and Anila, roly-poly and the local gossip server who offered Pujas three times a day. Now how on earth could she be a sex-phone operator? Well evidently she was and Gautam had just spent $98.78 unloading his fantasies onto a lady pushing the wrong side of 50 and if that was not bad enough, his reputation in the housing colony was toast.
He knew very well that if ladies like Kokila Aunty wanted to take down a reputation she could do that effectively without getting herself scorched. He remembered the case of an uncle, an old bachelor who he found nice enough but who was whispered to be a gay pedophile. Now the rumor mill had a new goat on the block - Gautam the local pervert. How was he ever going to return? With his hands shaking he reached for his laptop. So much code still needed to be written. At least no one here in US knew of this, that was the only saving grace.
Dude.....Gautam looked up and his apartment mates were standing in the corridor. Ajay was doubled up on the ground laughing and Vikas was staring at Gautam his mouth agape.
And then it suddenly came to him. They had been to Wal-Mart’s that evening and bought an extension handset.
Suddenly everything went blank and he knew he had been taken for a ride
However the educational system brought him back to reality with harsh lashings of its whip. He found out soon enough that the only thing he could play around with was the Linux kernel, the only promiscuous mode he would ever see would be in computer networks.
Infact, he and a couple of his friends took the campus bus and went to a bar to pick up some chicks. All that happened was that they sat there, drank alone, stared at each other, ogled the ladies who did not seem to even look at them through their cascading locks of gold and came back even more frustrated than before.
His friends still went to bars regularly; one of them even took the phone number of a girl he danced with on New Year's but well that was all they could do. Gautam after the few days had stopped frequenting bars and pubs as there was no way he could ever get noticed. Sadly, he realized that when it comes to hitting on chicks in bars, it does matter if you are brown.
And so Gautam stayed in a loft with 2 other desis while the American students downstairs would start partying from Thursday night he had to be contented with peering down at the girls making out with the guys on the porch and listening to the cries of passion emanating through the thin wooden walls while he ate his vegetable chow mein from his small white bowl.
He had tried chatting with girls on the Net but he could not trust anything on chat as it was obvious that the girls who wanted to talk hot were not really girls at all. And the girls, the very few that there were, would be immensely boring and trying to make a friendship of the long term variety - something that Gautam did not have the time for.
I mean after nights of endless coding he reasoned that talking about his family, his hobbies and his zodiac sign was a waste of effort when all he wanted was to get down to business.
One night he had returned from school at 2:30. The code had core-dumped without any explanation, his advisor was breathing down his neck, and the Chinese TA had put a B on an assignment unfairly. A night like any other night he thought as Gautam threw his head back on the torn couch and tried to collect his thoughts. His apartment mates Ajay and Vikas had gone shopping in the evening and God knows where they were so late maybe sleeping.
In a reflex action, he started surfing the channels on his TV - was there anything good on?
All infomercials, the fat burning grille, the get-rich-by-selling-real-estate, the amazingly loaded laptop that will be sold out in 10 minutes - Nothing new and then something caught his eye.
Are you tired? asked a blonde and that too a gorgeous piece of work.
Yes he was Gautam thought. Most definitely.
She was then joined by another bountiful babe who pouted: Are you lonely?
Oh Yes, tell me about it.
Another brunette with a generous display piped in: We are waiting for your call big boy.
Then a voice-over said encouragingly: We have real girls in your area who want to meet you and have a good time. Call 1-900-HOTTIES to blow your mind.
A cut to the three girls now slithering among themselves: What are you waiting for? Call 1-900-HOTTIES
The phone lay on the adjoining couch. Gautam looked at it longingly. Was this the real way to meet local girls? Of course not, this is a phone sex line; he knew all about them. He flipped the channel again - a Discovery channel special on the mating habits of the Siberian bear. Why not give it a try ?
What if the girls from his university were doing it for money? What if something happens and at the worst, there would be a real girl talking dirty on the other side - just the perfect arrangement. No aggravation of conversation, just jump to the good parts, no threat of rejection, total confidentiality and he realized that the rate on the ad was $1.49 per minute. Besides, it said that the first 3 minutes were also free. If he kept it down to 10 minutes then it could be a deal.
He had just been paid and come to thinks of it he owed something to himself.
He hesitated a bit and then his hand reached out to the phone. An automated husky voice greeted him and asked him to punch in his credit card number. Gautam thought again should he go ahead?
If he did so, there was no turning back. But it is said that one who hesitates, definitely loses. So he punched in his MasterCard. A reassuring voice told him that his card was being authorized and that he would not be charged till 3 minutes into a conversation with a real girl. Gautam liked the sound of that-nothing sleazy, full and fair business. In India sleaze means getting ripped off but here in US there is honor in smut. One of the many things he liked about the country.
A real female voice came on: Hi sir how would you like to be addressed?
Gautam asked: Am I being charged from now?
The friendly voice replied: No sir not yet. I am the pleasure facilitator (what a beautiful job Gautam thought). My job is to know a little bit about what you would like so that we can give you a fantastic experience. Yes sir how would you like to be addressed? Just the first name only sir.
Gautam thought of providing a false identity...but then he wanted to be addressed by his own name. It was more personal and heck who would ever know? But then again from his experiences in the bars he thought better of it and replied in his best American accent (which was pretty good)
Bob
So Bob! What kind of girl would you like: Swedish exchange-student, Japanese schoolgirl, Russian dominatrix, Vietnamese submissive, all-American cheerleader or an ebony pleasure-queen?
Wow Gautam thought-a buffet of succulent ladies. He thought for a while and said: How about an all-American cheerleader?
Sure Bob. We aim to please at 1-900-HOTTIES. Please wait why we redirect our call to your dream date. Your 3 minutes begin after she picks up the phone. Again congratulation on your choice...and enjoy
Gautam waited with bated breath. This sure beats the hell out of hanging endlessly in places where none even looked back at you. Instant, hassle-free gratification. In a few seconds he would be speaking to an All-American cheerleader
Click...and then an undecipherable voice...apparently a unmistakable Southern accent...Gautam could only make out a howdy partner and the rest of her words were lost in a mumble. Gautam in his American accent kept on repeating... Could you please try and speak a bit louder? But he could make neither head nor tail of what the girl was drawling. And in the corner of his brain the clock was ticking - the free minutes would be over in a flash and he had not yet understood what the hell she was trying to say.
And then straining to hear he could make out the background sound...despite the very thick Texan accent there was something very familiar with the ambient noise which was also contributing to her voice being drowned out. And finally he realized that sound; the unmistakable drone of heavy traffic and riotous blowing of horns. In which country are horns blown like this?
India! The penny dropped. The cheats had transferred his call to India! Texan beauty indeed... Gautam's voice rose - Has his call been Outsourced to India?
The voice at the other end immediately changed. A beautiful voice spoke in clear English: I apologise sir, but yes, your call has been outsourced to India.
Actually to keep operating costs down, the company has had to globalize these calls. Sir this is just a fantasy-I hope you understand, our parent company, has no legal obligation to provide you with the all-American girl you asked for. I apologize for my accent: I normally do the Japanese and the Vietnamese girl, but the girl who does the all-American cheerleader has just quit her job and I apologise profusely on behalf of the company
She continued with an amazingly sexy voice...However truth be told I am from India - the land of Kamasutra where the girls are as lush as the mighty Ganga and know how to please - I can be quite a handful. So tell me sir have you ever heard of the “flying monkey” position? Allow me to enlighten you in graphic details!
Gautam's indignation had been replaced by sympathy. Poor Indian girl must be some college kid forced to do this because of financial constraints. Which Indian girl would ever do such things on her own? And the teary voice of the girl had aroused the man in Gautam - poor lady. It was not her fault that the Texas girl quit. If this was an American he would abuse the poor Indian and hang up. But not Gautam. Even though he wanted to settle in US, he still loved his country. And its girls. And something about this girl's helplessness also excited him. He wondered why.
Gautam put on his best chivalrous knight tone. Reverting to his own accent he said: Hi I am Gautam not Bob. I am an Indian student too so you need not tell me about the Kamasutra - I live by it (well a white lie but as she said this was all a fantasy!).
The girl laughed a beautiful cadence - This girl really had an amazingly sexy voice.
She said: Hi Gautam, I am Monica and am all excited to meet you...Now, if I may ask you, where abouts in India do you come from?
Gautam glanced at the watch. Goddamn this was costing him plenty and they had not even talked a bit of what he had paid for. But he liked this-actually this conversation was much more exciting than a few minutes of mechanized huffing and puffing that he would have hoped to get.
Baroda, he replied.
Hey Baroda - that's cool I am from Baroda too, her voice rose a level. They have found a common ground, a connection source. You must be one of those geniuses who go to US after their engineering. Gautam smiled self-contentedly.
Gautam then launched into a rant about how lonely he was. At least that would serve as a justification for dialing a sex chat line. The girl was more than understanding about Gautam's loneliness. So don't you have a girl friend there? Some hot blonde in US who can look after your needs?
Gautam sighed. Of course not, or why else would he be calling here?
Well no Monica. I prefer brown skin - fairness turns me off.
The musical voice cooed. So Gautam do you have any girl friend in India?
Gautam was feeling exceedingly honest. Somewhere subconsciously he was falling in lust with this goddess of love. And he needed to start this relationship by making a clean breast of things
No Monica I do not. There was a girl in my locality I used to love and lust.
Monica giggled: Tell me about her.
Gautam was breathing noticeably heavier now. Oh god he thought, this lady knew how to press the right buttons. He then launched into a lurid description of a girl who lived in the same housing society and whom he had spent countless nights thinking about and was soon lost in explicit details of her anatomical attributes. Gautam thought of how delectably perverted this conversation had become but what amazed him was how accepting and understanding this Indian girl was. It was another matter that he was doing All the hot talking, the girl was merely encouraging him to go on and in the end he would have to foot the bill. Which Gautam realized must be quite high now. But he was no longer thinking with his head.
Wow Gautam. Your dream girl seems to be right out of the Khajuraho temple so is she the only one?
Gautam was talking in an impassioned whisper by now. She had an even hotter elder sister I have often fantasized about both of them together
The girl giggled again: So what were their names? And tell me about the fantasies involving both of them? Shweta and Anila - Well there was this one time when... The girl's tone changed a bit: Shweta and Anila Gupta
Was this one of them? Gautam's head was now turning cartwheels. Could it really be that one of the two goddesses was actually a phone sex operator? And that he had been talking dirty to one of those unattainable fairies for so long? Gautam excitedly replied: Yes, yes, do you know them?
Suddenly the line became silent. Had he been disconnected or had the girl been so ashamed of being found out that she had disconnected? Oh no! please no! as he yelled...Hello! Hello! Are you there?
The voice had now undergone a metamorphosis. Bastard...she shouted...I know you... You are that pot bellied idiot who used to stay in No 24 and would try to peek into our house...Go tell your dirty ideas to your own sister you bastard...Shameless idiot..One more thought about the two of them, I shall gouge out your hungry eyes and feed them to the crows and twist your little thingie out and leave it among the green chillies to dry... You got that! Scumbag?
Your parents sent you to US to study and this is how you spend your time there - Shameless Monkey.
A click of the telephone disconnecting and another automated voice... Thank you for using 1-900-HOTTIES. Your credit card has been charged $98.78 including call time, tax and state surcharges. Thank you once again and we hope to do business with you in the future.
Ninety Nine Dollars - that was almost what he spent on a month's grocery. But cash was the last thing on Gautam's mind as he sat on the couch- His head in his hands. He had recognized the voice that had berated him in the end. It was Kokila Aunty, the mother of Shweta and Anila, roly-poly and the local gossip server who offered Pujas three times a day. Now how on earth could she be a sex-phone operator? Well evidently she was and Gautam had just spent $98.78 unloading his fantasies onto a lady pushing the wrong side of 50 and if that was not bad enough, his reputation in the housing colony was toast.
He knew very well that if ladies like Kokila Aunty wanted to take down a reputation she could do that effectively without getting herself scorched. He remembered the case of an uncle, an old bachelor who he found nice enough but who was whispered to be a gay pedophile. Now the rumor mill had a new goat on the block - Gautam the local pervert. How was he ever going to return? With his hands shaking he reached for his laptop. So much code still needed to be written. At least no one here in US knew of this, that was the only saving grace.
Dude.....Gautam looked up and his apartment mates were standing in the corridor. Ajay was doubled up on the ground laughing and Vikas was staring at Gautam his mouth agape.
And then it suddenly came to him. They had been to Wal-Mart’s that evening and bought an extension handset.
Suddenly everything went blank and he knew he had been taken for a ride
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
How to Be a Jerk and Succeed Wildly With Women
Have you ever seen a guy who acts like a jerk but still manages to go home with beautiful women?
Well these guys know a secret which you can learn a lot from.
What they know is that many women are attracted to men who successfully combine being a jerk with having a humorous personality.
Often called "negging" or "cocky-funny", the idea behind this attitude is to act slightly arrogant while displaying intelligence and funny traits. It works because you are letting women know that you are confident while humorous enough to be desired.
If done correctly, this an incredibly powerful technique that makes girl instantly attracted to you. Here is how you can be the "funny/jerk" that women want...
First you should always remember to balance the attitude of a jerk while remaining funny. By acting too arrogant, you'll end up repulsing women instead of attracting them. On the other hand, if you spend the whole time cracking jokes you'll end up looking like a clown. Your goal is to carefully combine both attitudes and create the perfect "funny/jerk" personality.
So how do you go about becoming a funny/jerk?
To become a funny/jerk, it's important to create a certain attitude during your entire conversation with a woman. Your goal is to never making her completely comfortable when you are talking to her. This means you should tease her behavior or comments, and make her work for YOUR attention.
It works like this:
Whenever she says anything to you or asks a question, you come back with a comment that is funny, while slightly mocking her.
For instance, if a girl asks your name, you tell her that you can't reveal it, out of fear of her stalking you.
What you want to do is constantly use humor to catch her off guard. Anything she says should be responded to in a funny, slightly arrogant manner. Furthermore, try to implement a bit of sexual innuendo into your comments.
To create a successful "funny/jerk" attitude, need to work on altering your behavior in conversations with women. You can do this by sitting down and thinking of everything that a woman will typically say during a conversation. Then work on creating witty responses to the standard topics that often come up. Your focus is to create different statements that will catch her off guard while putting you in a position of dominance. The best lines will be ones that are humorous and slightly negative.
These principle behind the "funny/jerk" works because you are creating value for yourself to women you encounter. By being a little arrogant, you are letting her know that you are confident in yourself and that she'll have to work to get your attention.
My final piece of advice is to practice, practice, practice!
Creating a "funny/jerk" attitude is all about knowing what to say in each situation. At first, it may seem to go against the common thought of being "the nice guy" towards women. So in order to implement this attitude, you need to practice with women as much as possible.
When I say practice with women, I mean you need to try to take advantage of every situation where you are talking to a girl. Even if you don't want to pick them up, it's important that you use interactions with women to practice your comments and learn how to judge their responses.
Simply by practicing at all times, you'll learn the fine art of being a "funny/jerk". As a result, you'll discover that your interactions with women will improve and you'll end up going home with more women.
About the Author
Scott Patterson is a master at meeting, approaching, and attracting women.
To find out how you can pick-up ANY woman in 7 simple steps, check out his free ecourse
Well these guys know a secret which you can learn a lot from.
What they know is that many women are attracted to men who successfully combine being a jerk with having a humorous personality.
Often called "negging" or "cocky-funny", the idea behind this attitude is to act slightly arrogant while displaying intelligence and funny traits. It works because you are letting women know that you are confident while humorous enough to be desired.
If done correctly, this an incredibly powerful technique that makes girl instantly attracted to you. Here is how you can be the "funny/jerk" that women want...
First you should always remember to balance the attitude of a jerk while remaining funny. By acting too arrogant, you'll end up repulsing women instead of attracting them. On the other hand, if you spend the whole time cracking jokes you'll end up looking like a clown. Your goal is to carefully combine both attitudes and create the perfect "funny/jerk" personality.
So how do you go about becoming a funny/jerk?
To become a funny/jerk, it's important to create a certain attitude during your entire conversation with a woman. Your goal is to never making her completely comfortable when you are talking to her. This means you should tease her behavior or comments, and make her work for YOUR attention.
It works like this:
Whenever she says anything to you or asks a question, you come back with a comment that is funny, while slightly mocking her.
For instance, if a girl asks your name, you tell her that you can't reveal it, out of fear of her stalking you.
What you want to do is constantly use humor to catch her off guard. Anything she says should be responded to in a funny, slightly arrogant manner. Furthermore, try to implement a bit of sexual innuendo into your comments.
To create a successful "funny/jerk" attitude, need to work on altering your behavior in conversations with women. You can do this by sitting down and thinking of everything that a woman will typically say during a conversation. Then work on creating witty responses to the standard topics that often come up. Your focus is to create different statements that will catch her off guard while putting you in a position of dominance. The best lines will be ones that are humorous and slightly negative.
These principle behind the "funny/jerk" works because you are creating value for yourself to women you encounter. By being a little arrogant, you are letting her know that you are confident in yourself and that she'll have to work to get your attention.
My final piece of advice is to practice, practice, practice!
Creating a "funny/jerk" attitude is all about knowing what to say in each situation. At first, it may seem to go against the common thought of being "the nice guy" towards women. So in order to implement this attitude, you need to practice with women as much as possible.
When I say practice with women, I mean you need to try to take advantage of every situation where you are talking to a girl. Even if you don't want to pick them up, it's important that you use interactions with women to practice your comments and learn how to judge their responses.
Simply by practicing at all times, you'll learn the fine art of being a "funny/jerk". As a result, you'll discover that your interactions with women will improve and you'll end up going home with more women.
About the Author
Scott Patterson is a master at meeting, approaching, and attracting women.
To find out how you can pick-up ANY woman in 7 simple steps, check out his free ecourse
Monday, July 23, 2007
Do's and Don'ts on a First Date
The first date is a critical moment in any relationship.
You want to put your best foot forward and make a good impression. In fact, you want that so bad that your jitters and nervousness can derail your attempts to impress that date. Never fear, though, because if you follow the advice in this article, you are bound to make the best impression possible. If the girl or guy doesn't want to date you again, it might just be that you really aren't suited for each other. If this is the case, there isn't any point in wanting it to continue anyway, right? So here are some do's and don'ts that should smooth the way.
Do plan an actual date, such as a movie, concert, or dinner. Have an entertaining evening all planned out instead of just getting together to see what happens. You can always go to plan B later if things are going good.
Do be clean, well groomed, and appropriately dressed for the event.
Do be on time. Tardiness shows a great lack of respect for that other person. Likewise, showing up an hour early because you just can't wait puts pressure on them because they are probably not ready.
Do be decisive about the restaurant or other places you will go, but remain flexible. If you chose a steakhouse, but didn't realize your date was into vegetarian fare, it would be a kind gesture to change the plans to visit a restaurant more suitable to her tastes. Generally speaking, however, someone needs to be willing to make the decisions. Nothing is a bigger waste of time than two people batting a restaurant choice around.
Do take a little time to think up some things to talk about if you are both naturally quiet people. Most people like to answer questions about themselves. Try not to just ask a list of yes or no questions though, as though you are interrogating them. Ask questions that require more of an answer. Ask about his or her hobbies, interests, and ideas.
Don't, however, openly argue with your date's ideas. If you can tell that you are worlds apart in philosophy or religion, it might me a good idea to just enjoy the entertainment and find someone else to ask out the next time.
Don't spend your date doing something self-centered. For instance, if you go to an arcade, let your date play the games, too. Don't sit and talk on the cell phone or do business while you're together either. Your date should have your undivided attention.
Don't make them feel ogled or watched, however. If you find them extremely desirable, try to restrain yourself. Don't put them on the defensive. Give them time to get to know you, and they might find you equally desirable.
Finally, don't give up before you have given yourself and your date a fair chance. Remember that he or she is nervous, too. Don't get impatient about either pushing the relationship or giving up on it. Give it a chance to grow on its own.
About the Author
For more personal growth articles visit: http://www.personalgrowthunlimited.com
You want to put your best foot forward and make a good impression. In fact, you want that so bad that your jitters and nervousness can derail your attempts to impress that date. Never fear, though, because if you follow the advice in this article, you are bound to make the best impression possible. If the girl or guy doesn't want to date you again, it might just be that you really aren't suited for each other. If this is the case, there isn't any point in wanting it to continue anyway, right? So here are some do's and don'ts that should smooth the way.
Do plan an actual date, such as a movie, concert, or dinner. Have an entertaining evening all planned out instead of just getting together to see what happens. You can always go to plan B later if things are going good.
Do be clean, well groomed, and appropriately dressed for the event.
Do be on time. Tardiness shows a great lack of respect for that other person. Likewise, showing up an hour early because you just can't wait puts pressure on them because they are probably not ready.
Do be decisive about the restaurant or other places you will go, but remain flexible. If you chose a steakhouse, but didn't realize your date was into vegetarian fare, it would be a kind gesture to change the plans to visit a restaurant more suitable to her tastes. Generally speaking, however, someone needs to be willing to make the decisions. Nothing is a bigger waste of time than two people batting a restaurant choice around.
Do take a little time to think up some things to talk about if you are both naturally quiet people. Most people like to answer questions about themselves. Try not to just ask a list of yes or no questions though, as though you are interrogating them. Ask questions that require more of an answer. Ask about his or her hobbies, interests, and ideas.
Don't, however, openly argue with your date's ideas. If you can tell that you are worlds apart in philosophy or religion, it might me a good idea to just enjoy the entertainment and find someone else to ask out the next time.
Don't spend your date doing something self-centered. For instance, if you go to an arcade, let your date play the games, too. Don't sit and talk on the cell phone or do business while you're together either. Your date should have your undivided attention.
Don't make them feel ogled or watched, however. If you find them extremely desirable, try to restrain yourself. Don't put them on the defensive. Give them time to get to know you, and they might find you equally desirable.
Finally, don't give up before you have given yourself and your date a fair chance. Remember that he or she is nervous, too. Don't get impatient about either pushing the relationship or giving up on it. Give it a chance to grow on its own.
About the Author
For more personal growth articles visit: http://www.personalgrowthunlimited.com
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Online Dating Services And Dating Guides
Online dating is incredibly popular with millions around the world.
In fact, online dating is now a easier, far less expensive alternative to the singles nightclub. Men and women, now find relationships online from the comfort of their home computer. If you are somewhat new to the online dating scene, there are so many dating guides available. There is also a Guide on Online Dating for some useful dating tips, advice, and other valuable information that will help you succeed in finding that special someone.
Now, there are plenty of such books in the market. A few very good ones are listed on the side, and more such guides that provide useful dating tips are available at the above drop-down menu.
Online dating and adult personals are also one of the most sought after areas to make money online. Just for the records - the personals and dating category held its position as one of the largest paid content category above business and investment content, with $400 million plus in revenues, with an average 20% increase every year. Studies show that dating revenue shot up as much as 75% last year alone, and is targeted to grow well beyond expectations. It's no wonder, that Online Dating services is one of the money making opportunities and most exciting business and personal opportunities flooding the internet today.
However, this is an area, I was always apprehensive about. Mainly, because of a personal experience. I had joined an adult dating site some time back, to give it a free trial and was busy chatting away through my messenger. Little did I realise, that my online friend on the other side remove her clothes as she claimed that it was rather hot out there. Now this is a common situation. Eventually, I did switch the machine off, although reluctantly ! Now this is not an example to not start dating online, nor quickly joining an adult personal site. The word adult is contrived in the english dictionary. I say so because, anyone between 18 to 99 is an adult. but why is that, that word triggers the thought of sex into one's mind ?
You have to come to terms with the fact, the enormous make fast money potential that the adult personals and internet dating market has. As a result online dating affiliate programs are also one of the most sought after ones. There are numerous, dating and personals sites out there and if I guess correctly, most of them are doing quite well. A few of the good ones are mentioned highlighted on the left. However, if you are new to the market, you can always give each one of them a free trial, before signing up as an affiliate. I am not specifically recommending any one, as EACH ONE is good in its own way - so I won't be doing any justice by singling out a particular one. The problem is there are hundreds of dating web sites out there on the Web.
The best solution, you can take advantage of the FREE trial for these different dating sites before joining their affiliate program You can also experience the fun of interacting with an online date. However, PLEASE also note that some of them contain some adult or soft porn material. The personals and dating affiliate program revenue potential has a high rate of return. In short, the opportunities available for anyone with a website are enormous.
Mentioned below are some good dating guidesNo more Dull Dates
Are you tired of the same old dates? If you really want to spice things up and impress your date, then try out these 300 Creative Dates.
500 lovemaking tips
Lovemaking secrets and lovemaking tips that would drive your man or woman wild.
100 Great Sex Games for Couples
Has the closeness and intimacy faded ? Sex games, lovemaking, bedroom games and amazing foreplay tips
In plain language, it is exciting and fun content to capture the attention of visitors. So get ready to find a partner and also make money with Online Dating And Personals
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